3/12/09: Tralala Tralala :)

Ya know, when I type in the heading of a post in the Blogspot template it autofills. This is unremarkable typically but as I just typed in the date above, several dates from March of last year came up complete with their corresponding titles. It instantly shot me back to March 2009 ... at this time last year, I was beginning my ill fated dance with The Gentleman, still deciding whether Backpack was for me, and having fun, Platonic interactions with PTC. Funny ...

I no longer think about any of these people. I haven't seen any of them since this time last year. I haven't heard from anyone except PTC but that was last September and I wasn't really feeling a friendship with him so I fell off the face. I'm now securely ensconced in the graces of Friend, who is so fucking wonderful that I can't even find words in English to express how ridiculously lucky I am. I find myself in a situation I've witnessed with countless friends. All women reading this will understand ... you have a friend who struggles, as I did, through the pitfalls of dating. She meets assholes, losers, flakes, all manner of unacceptable man. You have long, torturous phone conversations about why she can't seem to meet anyone, why she is a freakshow magnet, whether she'll be alone forever. I personally, have been both the crier and the consoler more times than I care to count.

Then, somehow without warning, that same downtrodden, exasperated friend stops calling. She stops complaining about not having met anyone. Because she did. And then you don't really hear anything else. No teary phone calls, no distressed messages ... everything seems, magically somehow, to be fine. When things work, there's no need for discussion. I haven't really felt the need to run to the phone to talk to my girlfriends about Friend because we're cool. I trust him. Whoa.

So, here at this point I'd like to take this opportunity to say thank you. Thank you to all of my friends who put up with all of those teary, depressed phone calls and conversations. Thank you to everyone who read this blog with patience and cheered me on when I really wanted to quit the whole scene after Freckles. Thank you to everyone who, in their wisdom, told me to be patient, that it would happen when I least expected it, and that I was awesome no matter what.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I think back on all the people I went out with. I don't feel sad about or miss any of them anymore. They are now just stories. They are stepping stones that lead me to Friend. I firmly believe that everything in life happens for a reason. I feel that I needed to get involved with Freckles, so he could dump me on my futon in the afternoon sun, so I could feel dejected, quit the online scene and slowly, slowly open the door for Friend. So many people told me in the months leading up to our romantic beginning that I should date Friend. Why not, they said. He's awesome, smart, nice, well-dressed (very well dressed ... and he regularly uses lotion on his face and body. Sounds weird to note that but some men are so ashy, it's distracting) and OBVIOUSLY INTO YOU. I shrugged these things off, saying I just wasn't feeling that romantic vibe ... so silly, I was.

So, here I am, on the other side. To everyone out there who still feels alone, like they won't meet anyone, etc. ... believe me now and hear this: YOU WILL. I was in complete disbelief. I actually had very hostile feelings towards anyone who said this to me, particularly if they had found someone. Easy for them to say, I'd think, they have a great boyfriend/husband. How soon they forget how fucking hard and sucky this being single nonsense is. But, I must now eat all of my words and my hostility. They were right.

I will continue to post because, why not? Some of you have met Friend and were able to witness the awesomeness of him. I'm not exaggerating. Of all the people in the world, he chose me and as I said above, this makes me feel so incredibly lucky. Before you all think I've gotten ahead of myself, which I tend to do, I will acknowledge that it has been ONLY two and a half months. We are not having the conversation. I have not met the most important person in his life yet (Mother) and until I do, 10% of me will consider this temporary. However, things seem to sparkle in my brain when he's around. He says something to me or does something for me and with a smile, I realize that nine times out of ten, I was about to say or do the same thing. He supports me like no other person I've ever dated. Recently, through two job interviews before which he sent multiple texts reminding how awesome and sexy I am. Obviously, being sexy has nothing to do with getting a job (especially at a touchy feely non-profit staffed almost completely by women) but damn, that's always nice to hear.

Ok, I'm babbling now. I'll stop. Going out of my city to another for the weekend ... see you soon. Hope everyone is enjoying the beginning of Spring. Thought she'd never come.