4/14/09 - Date Forty Five: Ethiopian ... Again.

Damn. Never thought I'd say it but I think Ethiopian has taken over sushi as the number one most suggested food option when you tell a man that you don't eat meat. Not that I'm complaining or anything, it's just uncanny. Think I've had five Ethiopian food dates now ... the more interesting story about this date, though doesn't have anything to do with the date itself but other random surrounding circumstances that served to make the whole night really weird.

First thing that happened was when I was sitting at the outside patio waiting for this guy to show. Oh, let's call him Glasses Too Small for Face, or GTSFF. Seriously, he was a big guy, tall, broad but these glasses he had!! Holy moly!! It was like he'd had them since he was a gangly, awkward twelve year old. Very funny looking. But I digress ... I'm sitting at the table, looking at the menu, feeling really tired and wanting to just go home and who walks by, mere feet from me? This total freaking douchebag I dated for about two months last fall who gave me the following ultimatum on Election night: if you leave my apartment, it's over. Are you kidding? The country has just elected our first black president, the entire world is celebrating and you want to coerce me into staying with you by acting like a child and threatening me?? FREAKSHOW. Needless to say, I put my boots back on and walked out and haven't seen him since. Until this moment. I looked at him, he at me and we both ignored obviously. I realized in that moment that a side effect of all this dating is an increased chance of the random run in ... no worries, though. My date arrived seconds later and my mind quickly forgot about FREAKSHOW and moved to conversation with GTSFF.

The first words out of his mouth were the following: "So I walked behind a naked guy on the way here." I'm sorry, what? He repeated and proceeded to tell me that he walked behind a totally naked fellow, 30's, fit, african american, for multiple blocks on his way to the restaurant. Ok. BEST OPENING STORY ON A FIRST DATE EVER. Right?? I told him so and the conversation remained sparkling till the food was gone. Then we took a turn, not sure how, and I began to hear exclusively about two things: the XGF he moved to my city for (who he swears he's over ... sure, buddy) and his financial woes. Again, I'm sorry, what? Ya know that sound effect used in uncomfortable situations on sitcoms that sounds like a record being quickly stopped and it scratches and then there are crickets? Well, that's what this was like. The conversation died. I couldn't wait to get out of there.

Then it began to rain. I looked up and had weird experience number three (if I count the strange death of what started out as a date with potential that turned into a really uncomfortable situation) ... I looked up and was staring straight at Backpack. He was waiting at the corner for the light to change. The restaurant we were eating at is situated on the corner and he was staring straight at me. He looked like he was stunned, and I guess I was, too. We held eye contact for about 3 seconds and I looked away, realizing that I was having this very intense moment while sitting in the company of someone who had no idea what was going on. I regained composure and tuned back in to the conversation just in time to hear more about the XGF. I looked away again (I couldn't help myself) and I saw Backpack crossing the street, looking back at me.

Ouch, guys. Ouch. Thankfully, as if sensing that I was all set with being out for the evening, GTSFF asked for the check, paid it, and we rolled out. I was secretly praying that both Backpack and FREAKSHOW had left the area so there wouldn't be any more weird run ins. We stood at the corner, me aching to just get the hell outta there, and him prattling on about something and we finally hugged goodbye. He then bizarrely decided to get a beer at a bar that was about a block down the street in the direction that I was going so after having said goodbye we talked a bit more and then FINALLY parted ways, allowing me to call a friend and tell her about these weird coincidences. Out of eyesight of GTSFF, of course ...

So, as you can see the most interesting things about this date were not the date himself. Except that naked man story. Sweet. Don't really think I'm gonna see him again ... there was no spark. Learned that the world is getting smaller. This could be a good thing, though. If running into some of the freaks I dated last year allows me to air some of those stories here, it'll only make for better reading!